Monday, June 3, 2013

POD Locked...

~or, The Good Sport…

“A funny thing happened on the way home…” which is what I am sure a particular Empyrean told his corpmates this past weekend. You see this guy was a good pretty sport about a very bad decision.

And FYI, this posts name has a very particular meaning for me... and it does not mean, "the POD is target locked"... No, it is named for a particular method of Hisec Wardec Griefing for Ransom and Fun that a good friend of ours used to use back in the heyday of Hisec OMC (One Man Corp) wardeccing...

POD Locking is where, after you destroy a target vessel and you get a lock & scram & dual web on the POD... you don't kill him. You just hold him there... forever... seriously, until downtime at the least and if you're on the ball, you can catch him at uptime and extend the POD Lock a whole 'nother day... It's just plain cruel...  =]

This eventually ends when the target decides either to pay the ransom or self assplode... It can be quite a riot (for the locker, not the lockee) and a major cause of some truly facinating local banter (from the lockee)... It also produced some very nice ransoms too... So 'POD Locked' has a bit deeper meaning that just "I have him!"... but I digress...

So, we had the “Holy Rollers Fleet” up…
A Scanner (a ‘Master of Probing’ until Odyssey drops, then any ol toon will do... meh) ;
One or two cloaky Scouts;
Orcas, Fat Ass One & Fat Ass Two (or Orca/BS/BS);
And the Deal Closer, one of our Moros pilots…
Plus the usual tag alongs, them as are hoping for pew pew or a Hisec hole or just bored and it’s something to do…

Anyhoo, we had fleet up and I, being more of a pew pew guy nowadays, was in one of my Sabres, you know, JIC. But this one was slightly refit for just Rolling Ops… My usual is a Dubble Bubble Cloaky Sabre, but Rolling Ops are usually a bit of a snorefest for those as flying CAP (Combat Air Patrol, IE Security) so I refit for a little fun… I dropped one Bubbler for a Festival launcher loaded with Snoballz with which I harass and generally make a pest of myself to my corpmates and allies.

So I am in my Rolling Sabre JIC something interesting pops up… and it did. The Op was going as usual when alla sudden there was an Anathema uncloaking OUTSIDE of jump range of the hole… WTF??? He was burning to the hole THROUGH our fleet… LOL we were ALL over it… It was like whacking a hornets’ nest!

And my Rolling Sabre is also dual Sebo fit, so she’s a POD Killer… I tapped the MWD, turned and burned towards him while hitting the bubbler then I hit my Fed Navy webber and tapped his icon. I had him locked and webbed afore the bubble was fully inflated… disengaged MWD and started the music of my 200mm AC II's on him... the Anathema assploded and the POD was left rocking in the smoke and debris of his little ship, trapped in my bubble.

The FC was calling “Hold Fire! Hold Fire! Don't shoot the POD, points and webs ONLY!” so we could all whore the POD kill. So I hit him with my webber, orbited at 500m and kept the bubbles coming one a minute every minute... then I hit F4, the Snoballer of Deth...  =]

Everyone saw I was smackin him with Snoballz and shortly thereafter he started getting hit by every firework CCP has produced…  LOL!

We had like 5 or more webs on him, I kept popping bubbles 500m from him no matter where tried to go at his measly 15m/s and all the while he is being orbited by ALL of us and he is being hit by 'Focus Fire Fireworks'… Then the Moros pilot starts trying to kill him for real… ZOMG!

During all of this there was, as you might imagine, a somewhat interesting convo going on in local…

Draconic Slayer > WAIT
Pell Helix > sup
Draconic Slayer > bby
Pell Helix > ?
Draconic Slayer > pls, we're trying to help Red Circle
Draconic Slayer > I just want to get out, lol
Pell Helix > Well there’s really only the one way out right now, haha.
Draconic Slayer > THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT
Draconic Slayer > lol
Pell Helix > ?
Draconic Slayer > well, I meant like getting out with my pod
Pell Helix > Slaves or something better?
Draconic Slayer > No, not really
Pell Helix > Well we're not really looking for an exit right now.
Draconic Slayer > It's just some fitting/hardwiring
Draconic Slayer > :(
Draconic Slayer > I thought we had something, something special
Pell Helix > If you'd like to pay some ransom we'd be more than happy to throw you through the next hole.
Draconic Slayer > well, assuming I could have an exit, sure ^.^
Pell Helix > Wait, did you just jump in through the hole we closed?
Draconic Slayer > Yeah, lol
Pell Helix > didn't see the Moros? lol
Draconic Slayer > I was going back since were planning to roll the hole
Draconic Slayer > no, I didn't
Pell Helix > He is ninja Moros
Draconic Slayer > Jumped when it went half mass
Draconic Slayer > I was planning to go back and roll the hole, but I just had to check this one last hole I scanned...
Draconic Slayer > oh god

Pell Helix > yeah I saw your probes when I hopped in, fast scan.
Draconic Slayer > Well, could you be a pal and give me an entrance??
Pell Helix > Billion ISK and we give you the convenient K-space.
Draconic Slayer > ?*
Draconic Slayer > wat, my pod isn't that much
Pell Helix > (Doesn't involve podding you)
Draconic Slayer > bbypls
Pell Helix > ?
Draconic Slayer > I thought we were butt buddies
Draconic Slayer > m8, this isn't what butt buddies do

(Some “ya-da ya-da” about  Red Circle and Razor…)

Draconic Slayer > I really feel like you should give me an entrance
Draconic Slayer > or, exit that doesn't involve my pod being destroyed here
Pell Helix > Oh we have a K-space I'm willing to give you
Pell Helix > Direct in baby
Pell Helix > But these guys won't stop pointing you for free, even if I'm getting bored.
Draconic Slayer > I can offer my ass
Draconic Slayer > it's very tight, as far as I know  (<- WTF!?!?!  LOL)
Draconic Slayer > but like
Draconic Slayer > Kspace bruh
Pell Helix > K-space! da!
Draconic Slayer > well
Draconic Slayer > sort of, I guess
Draconic Slayer > welp
Draconic Slayer > thanks for the fish

He stops his POD, 0.0ms… the Moros still can’t hit him…

Draconic Slayer > ok, come on
Draconic Slayer > I'm not even moving anymore
Draconic Slayer > can you guys give him tracking links or something
Draconic Slayer > or use paints
Draconic Slayer > MOAR PAINTS

And moar paints seem to do the trick…  [POP!]

And the obligatory Film At 11…

Fly Safe and see you in the Sky  =/|)=

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